Naked Interview

Fuck sake! The bastarn things started an’ I huvnae even goat my shirt oan. Bastard pre-recorded interview fur the Department of Shirk and Truncheons. Cannae pause it it says. Got to keep goin’ now it’s started.

‘Tell us about a time when you had to deal with a difficult situation. What did you do and what was the result?’

Christ! I’m virtually topless here, shirt hauf oan an’ no’ even a tie. Well, obviously no’ a tie. That would look even worse, jist a tie an’ nae shirt. They’d think I wis looney-tunes if they didnae already. ‘This cunt here cannae even get it thegither tae get his claes oan. Fur aw we know he’s naked on the bottom half as well. Sittin’ ther in his bare arse!’.

I hud it aw set up fine but there must huv been a timer or suhink that I didnae know about.

“Erm, a difficult situation? Well, I was working in a job centre down south an’ ther wis this drunk guy shouting the odds an’ security escorted him out and he fell in a puddle and his head was bleeding, and I….”

‘Question 2. Tell us about a time when you influenced others. What was the reason and what did you do?’

Fuck sake!